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23/06/2026 7:33 pm
So many people meet, develop their relationship and make the decision to get married. The first couple of years together mark a time of learning about each other. It’s a time of infatuation growing into something more mature. The Philia or deep friendship love becomes a time of Eros love (the sexual passion) that fuels a driving force in the new marriage. Over time each person notices slow changes occurring.
Often the pressures of life begin to take hold. The desire to climb the corporate ladder and gain prestige shows up. Perhaps children have come along and a need to work more hours to increase financial resources is becoming prevalent. A thousand reasons for a person to spend time working on something knocks on the door every day, leeching happiness and playfulness
out of the relationship.
This is the time when maturity is needed. People will look to material things to demonstrate their commitment to the partner. Maybe a new wardrobe, new car or furniture shows up to say “Honey, I love you”. But that adds to the financial pressure which then pulls the couple further apart because of time away and stress related to debt.
To reach forever love in a marriage, it isn’t about the random ‘vacation away from it all’ or the next ‘new thing’. Those are nice but often lead to new stress points brought about by financial strain or competition with friends and family to outdo or keep up with them.
Forever love is a hundred acts of kindness bestowed upon the partner every day, without fail. These are the things that linger in the mind of the recipient long past the tossing away of the few material things that have lost their usefulness.
If you want a marriage that stands the trials and tests of time, love your partner a hundred different times and ways, every day. Do things that don’t cost money but pay the greatest dividends. Become a student of what they like and don’t like. Figure out what they are drawn to or brings a smile to their face. Say, do, and be, the things they like, avoid those things that they do not care for.
When the children are grown and gone, it will be just the two of you. You’ll thank me for this then.
10/07/2026 4:29 pm
So true, lasting love is found in kindness, patience, and the daily effort we give to our spouse.